Bands, Television

Deer Tick Making Television Debut Tonight on Letterman

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, June 16th, 2010 3:00 pm

After last week’s release of The Black Dirt Rising Sessions, Deer Tick’s third album, the band will make its television debut on The Late Show with David Letterman. Letterman is such a cool guy; he’ll definitely love the band’s always-partying, dark-as-death ways! Last week, Death + Taxes interviewed the band, who had some choice things to say about doing the late-night talk-show circuit. MORE »

Dick of the Week: M.I.A.

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Friday, May 28th, 2010 2:35 pm

M.I.A. (or Maya, or /\/\/\Y/\, or 8====D), you dick! Over the course of the past year or so, M.I.A. has been many things: political pundit, designer of weird, geometric leggings, pregnant, champion against the ginger race — you get the picture.

Recently, she’s done many things in what appears to be part of another personal pursuit — becoming completely fucking obnoxious. MORE »

Track Review: “Shower Curtain” - The Dardys

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 26th, 2010 4:05 pm

“Shower Curtain,” the newest single by LES mainstays The Dardys, is now streaming on their MySpace. It’s a pop song with some serious, quiet charm - as well as the source of one of the best origin stories that I’ve heard recently. Band member Jimmy Keithly stayed the night at fellow Dardy David Heffernan’s apartment one evening. Where upon awakening the next morning and getting ready to leave, many would leave a typically polite thank-you note, Keithly left a poem. It was called - surprise!- “Shower Curtain,” and included the line “You stick to yourself. I peel you away,” which later became the chorus of this song. I wish my houseguests would leave me sweet poems that eventually morphed into winning pop songs instead of, uh, unmade beds. I’m jealous of this band’s fortitude, but it’s hard to hate them when their music is so cool. Thanks for making me feel so conflicted, assholes.

Safe Sex, Bro! Ed Hardy Launches Line Of Condoms

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 26th, 2010 2:40 pm

Making fun of Ed Hardy bothers me in the same way that skewering hipsters and Juggalos does. It’s like shooting poorly-dressed fish in a barrel. I think the brand is actively encouraging the hate, because nothing else could really explain the energy drinks, the exhaustive line of car accessories, and now, the condoms. We might as well give Christian Audiger what he wants and indulge in what has become the fast-food of mockery, which is to say, thank God we’ll be seeing a lot less orange babies! Am I right, or am I right?! LOL!

Facebook CEO Begins To Grasp That Users’ Privacy Is Important To Them

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 26th, 2010 12:25 pm

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, who to me has always looked like what would happen if Prince Harry and Screech from Saved by the Bell procreated, knows he screwed up. In a statement that reads much like a letter from a lover who knows he’s in the doghouse, he just wants to make it up to you, baby. He wants to show you he can change…the privacy settings. He has some new, easy-to-use ways to get out of sharing all your personal information with corporations. This time, girl, you’ll actually know whether or not your info is locked up. Shh, don’t talk. Just uncheck that box and let’s see where the night takes us. MORE »

A Review Of Elliot Allagash By An Attractive Girl - As Imagined By Simon Rich, Author of Elliot Allagash

Simon Rich :: Tuesday, May 25th, 2010 4:30 pm

Simon Rich is perhaps the funniest writer in America. A writer for Saturday Night Live, the show has enjoyed a serious upswing in funniness under his tutelage. His first two books of short essays, Ant Farm and Free Range Chickens, are some of the most hysterical writing you’ll find anywhere, and his fantastic debut novel, Elliot Allagash, releases today. Rich was kind enough to ~~review it~~ have his extremely attractive female review it for us.

Until discovering Elliot Allagash, I was only attracted to tall, virile men. But this novel was so hilariously funny that it turned my entire worldview upside down. I am now attracted exclusively to comedy writers, and specifically, to Simon Rich.

As soon as I finished Elliot Allagash, I thought to myself: “Wow. Whoever wrote this book seems intelligent, charming and sexually normal.” Intrigued, I decided to flip to the author photo. That’s when my attraction to Mr. Rich turned into a kind of physical obsession.

I mean, look how cool this guy looks! MORE »

Adam Ant Sent To Mental Hospital After Continued Insane Ant-ics

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Friday, May 21st, 2010 5:50 pm

The original dandy highwayman has been taken into custody at Chelsea & Westminster Hospital after the latest in weird offenses against public decency. In the past, from what I can remember, he has gotten wasted and threatened people with a fake gun, broken into neighbor’s houses in the buff, and screamed a lot in public, in addition to making some music videos that aren’t exactly the picture of mental health. Below, a step-by-step analysis of what went wrong in one of them. This could have been prevented if we only looked at the warning signs, people! MORE »

Arizona Considering Pulling L.A.’s Power? Go Ahead, Make Their Day

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Friday, May 21st, 2010 3:10 pm

In response to the Los Angeles City Council’s boycott of all things Arizona, the Arizona Corporation Commission, which controls Arizona’s utilities and power, has flirted with the idea of denying L.A. electricity from Arizona. Arizona power makes up about 25% of the supply for Los Angeles, so this statement would be a massive one if it actually happened…which it should, in my opinion. Bring it on and turn it off, Arizona. Let’s see just how much good it does you, shall we? MORE »

Hooters Girl Told By Employers To Lose Weight

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 19th, 2010 3:40 pm

20-year-old Cassie Smith is 5’8″ and 132 pounds. She’s worked at Hooters for approximately two years, but that might change pretty soon. The Roseville, Michigan resident made national news by reporting to the media that Hooters demanded that she lose weight or hang up her orange hot shorts. MORE »

What to Wear Steve Madden’s New “Snookie” Shoes With

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 19th, 2010 2:30 pm

This new excruciatingly glittery shoe by Steve Madden pays homage to its namesake’s legacy by being as tacky as Snooki herself. I would recommend wearing these beauties with a classic Snooki outfit: A leopard thong, a short, white miniskirt, and French braids. That is her signature hairstyle, right?

Interview: Christopher Chu of the Morning Benders

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Monday, May 17th, 2010 5:20 pm

With the aid of a smattering of successful SXSW shows, a beautiful new symphonic-pop album out, and a certain lovely viral video, The Morning Benders have become one of the most widely discussed bands of the season. I sat down with Christopher Chu, the lead singer of the band, to discuss recent successes, what it means to be a purist, and his fondness for the genius that is R. Kelly. MORE »

Incredible 13-Year-Old Upstages Lady Gaga

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Friday, May 14th, 2010 3:45 pm

Beautiful piano arrangements and unexpected, lilting vocals are not what I think of when I hear Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi.” That is, not unless it’s being performed by 13-year-old Greyson Michael Chance. He’s a musical prodigy with a Disney-ready, stage-mom-approved name, and he’s surely on his way to superstardom. MORE »

Mariah Carey Got the Weirdest Anniversary Gift Ever

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 12th, 2010 4:25 pm

Fuck. This is a Ring Pop made out of white gold, white diamonds and pink sapphires, given from Nick Cannon to Mariah Carey. How do people justify spending obscene amounts of money on shit like this? More importantly, how are you supposed to coordinate this with the rest of your outfit? I think I’d rather have a regular Ring Pop. That way, you get two accessories for the price of one - the ring itself and the red lips/mouth that come with it - as well as some real candy, as opposed to something that would hurt if I tried to bite it.

Diane Cluck at Sidewalk Cafe, 5/11

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 12th, 2010 3:35 pm

Diane Cluck is the kind of singer/songwriter that is hard to discuss. With many other bands, your observations are that they’re cool, or you like that one guitar riff, or something, but to watch Diane Cluck perform is to be completely speechless and attuned to trying to catch her quick lyrics as they slip past one another. Her guitar playing is nothing special, but her voice definitely is, and the poetry that that voice is pouring out is inimitably gorgeous. MORE »

Five Things (Kittens?) I Learned From Street Boners by Gavin McInnes

Amy Rose Spiegel :: Wednesday, May 12th, 2010 2:50 pm

“Hipster hipster hipster fashion hipster hipsterdom.” Essentially, this is the message I took away from the back cover of Street Boners, the upcoming fashion joke book by Gavin McInnes. Somehow he fails to see the irony of when in the introduction of the book, he asks, “Can we stop talking about hipsters now?” and then proceeds to do just that for 339 pages. (But, hey, isn’t irony the language all true hipsters are fluent in, anyway? Maybe he does understand the youth today!) Talking about hipsters, which McInnes describes as “a young enthusiast of contemporary, alternative, pop culture,” is his specialty, so no, he apparently can’t stop talking about hipsters now, or ever, for that matter. McInnes has based a career on first penning the DOs and DON’Ts feature for Vice Magazine, then doing the similar Street Boners section for his website, Street Boners and TV Carnage. Here is my five-kitten rating for this book, which each kitten representing a point that I took away from his collection of snarky missives. MORE »