News
Kid Loses Nut From “Sack Tapping”
Carmel Lobello :: Wednesday, June 2nd, 2010 4:23 pm
This just in: punching your friends in the nuts as hard as you can is a terrible idea. “Sack Tapping”, the extremely popular high school “game” of seeing who can withstand the hardest blow to the groin has recently resulted in a kid having to have his testicle surgically removed. I’m not a urologist, or even a boy for that matter, but I totally could have told that kid that the “winner” of that game is actually the loser. Here are a couple other popular activities that look from here like they will eventually result in a hospital visit:
1. Space Monkey: Taking a bunch of deep breaths to mimic hyperventilating and then cutting off the circulation to your brain with your hands, or if you’re really hard-core, some kind of rope. The point of this is to induce an extremely short, drug-like euphoria. Alternative: Smoke weed.
2. Sura De Bunda: A new dance craze that involves a guy being slapped really hard in the face by a girl’s booty. Not only is it really crude, but it’s also kind of painful looking, and should probably be reserved for professionals (ie strippers). Alternative: The Macarena
3. Highway Sprint: Running across a really busy multi-lane highways and not getting hit. This is by far the most dangerous and idiotic of the games, but some of our staff has apparently played it and lived to tell the tale. Alternative: Stay at home and play Frogger.
4. Gold Fish Shots: Putting a live gold fish into a shot of beer and then swigging it. I guess it’s fun-sounding in a Double Dare kind of way, and I remember growing up in Vermont, the boys used to play a red neck version of this where they would swallow beers full of live minnows and talk about how they could feel them swimming to their stomachs. I clearly remember this one kid getting really sick and puking after one of these sessions, probably from ingesting some kind of pond bacteria. Alternative: What’s fun about this is actually the beer, not the gold fish. Just drink a few of the BL Limes from the fridge downstairs and call it a day.